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Want Sex Without a Relationship

Published: January 06, 2014
Dear TeenhealthFX,

Hi, I'm a 15 ear old male, 16 in a few weeks and I know that I am ready for sex, and I really want to have sex but the thing is I don't want to be in a relationship, I just really don't like it. How do I approach asking somebody for sex? I know people who are like me, don't want a relationship but have sex, I'm just a quiet type of guy. I don't want to "fuck" because to me that carries a different meaning than sex. I want an intimate encounter, not just a blow job then a ride home So my question is,  there any particular way to ask someone for sex?

Dear Want Sex Without a Relationship,

In some ways your question is difficult to answer because you are giving off mixed signals. You'd like to have sex but you don’t want a relationship while at the same time you want to have sex but you want it to be meaningful. When you say “intimate encounter” that implies some type of close bond is involved.

TeenHealthFX is not quite sure how you would go about getting desires met. When in doubt, it is usually the best policy to go with the truth. If you find yourself attracted to someone who you would like to be intimate with, you should explain your feeling up front. If the other person is comfortable with this arrangement then your problem is solved. The one thing you shouldn’t do is lie to a potential partner just to satisfy your own needs. A sexual relationship for many people is based on a close personal commitment. Misleading someone who feels that way can cause a lot of emotional damage and it’s not fair to the person.

Although, you say you’re ready for sex, you may want to give more thought to the emotional aspect of it. While your plan may sound good it is not always that easy to execute. Have you considered that it is not easy to have a sexual relationship without developing deep affection for your partner? The heart has a mind of its own and you could get hurt because you develop feelings for your partner and they are not reciprocated because she is sticking to the original deal.



Signed: TeenhealthFX