Dating Violence & Date Rape / Question
Published: January 21, 1999
Dear TeenHealthFX,
I was assigned the topic of date rape for a report with visuals for Health class. Please give me some information on it.
Signed: Info on Date Rape
Dear Info on Date Rape,
Date rape, frequently called acquaintance rape is unwanted sexual intercourse performed by a known person of the victim. The perpetrator (person performing the date rape) can be a friend, relative, boyfriend, classmate, etc. Also, the date rape usually does not occur in a dark alley, but at parties while a party is going on downstairs or in your houses.
Acquaintance rape is quite common among teenagers and young adults. Although most rapes go unreported, some statistics say that acquaintance rapes accounts for 50 % - 75 % of all rapes reported. In fact, the
Date rape and any type sexual abuse are violent crimes. It is not done for sexual pleasure, but the rapist gets satisfaction from using control and force to make someone (usually a female) have sex with him. In most cases, women are usually the victims and men are usually the attackers, but it can happen the other way around.
A good discussion point and piece to include in your report would be Rohypnol. Rohypnol, sometimes called Roofies or the date rape drug is a drug that is used by the perpetrator to make the victim unaware of his/her surrounding (a high or drunk feeling). After the drug wears off, the victim usually has no memory what happened. Oftentimes, roofies are mixed with alcohol or dissolved in someone's drink at a party. This is one more thing that adds to the mix when dealing with acquaintance rape.
Any good report on date rape should discuss prevention of date rape and identification of a possible rapist or abuser.
Prevention - Some ways to avoid the date rape/acquaintance rape situation:
- Be aware of the potential signs of an abuser - see below
- Know that it can happen to you
- Set boundaries and sexual limits in relationships. If you do not like when someone is touching you in certain way, say NO and mean it.
- Communicate effectively - Be clear about what you are okay with and do not give mixed messages. (Do not say "no" and mean "yes" or the other way around)
- Do not use alcohol and drugs.
- Do not leave your drink unattended at a party or social gathering.
- Do not put yourself in a secluded area with someone you do not know very well. Try to have friends with you on the initial dates.
- Trust your gut feeling - If you feel you are in future danger and can escape, get out of the situation. If you feel like you are in immediate danger and the perpetrator is threatening you or your life, trust your feelings. Sometimes a person being date raped has to stay in the situation until it is over and then go to report it. Remember, acquaintance rape in not about sex, it is about violence!
Identification - Some signs of a potential abuser or rapist are:
- Is or has been emotionally abusive or physically abusive (says negative things, ignores you, hits you)
- Tells partner how to dress and act
- Extreme jealously
- Alcohol or drug abuse
- Past acts of violence
- Negatively talks about women
- Uses threats of harm when angry
- Consistently acts tough to hide his low self-esteem
- Extreme mood swings (loses temper easily)
To The Victims - How do they feel? What should they do?
Most importantly when doing your paper, you should give information on what to do if a person has been a victim of date rape. If someone thinks they have been date raped either unknowingly (used roofies) or are sure of it, they need to be advised to go get medical help and report it. They will need a medical evaluation to deal with possible pregnancy issues and sexually transmitted diseases. While they are getting their medical evaluation, the health care provider will discuss future counseling for the victim and get them in touch with the help they need. The Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network (RAINN) is a good hotline number to include in your paper. They can be reached at (800) 656.HOPE (4673).
"Rape Trauma Syndrome"
A victim of date rape many times goes through what professionals describe as "Rape Trauma Syndrome". Essentially, these are stages that the victim goes through when dealing with the rape. Each victim of rape is different in how quickly they pass through these stages so there is no definite number of days or time period given for these stages. Some rape survivors can quickly come to terms with their feeling while others could take years.
1. The Acute Stage - a period immediately following the rape. Victims can act and feel in many different manners including hysterical, angry, crying, numb, little emotion, lack of memory and difficulty concentrating.
2. The Outward Adjustment Stage - a continuation of the acute stage where the person violated may feel continued fear and depression, anxiety, withdrawal from friends and family, mood swings and helplessness. The victim at this point should be in professional counseling to deal with the issues surrounding the rape.
3. The Resolution Stage - a victim may still have some of the same fears and symptoms of the other stages; however they are coming to grips with the assault. At this point, the rape survivor is choosing to accept the rape as part of his life and go on.
As far as your visuals and more information for your report, you may want to gather some statistics and make an overhead or show a short film on a victim of date rape. Check out these other rape web sites for more information:
Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network
Signed: TeenHealthFX
30% of teens with depression also have a substance abuse problem.
