Career Paths And Working / Question
Published: January 28, 2010
Dear TeenHealthFX,
I want to be something that my dad doesn't agree with when I grow up. He's trying to decide what profession I will go in himself, which is the same exact thing he is doing now for a living. I don't know how to talk to him about it, he seems to think education, no matter how much you hate the job, is the most important thing. What should I do?
Signed: I Want To Decide My Own Career
Dear I Want To Decide My Own Career,
There is no reason why education and job satisfaction should be mutually exclusive. It is hard to tell whether your statement is more about how your dad views his job or how you view yourself in your father’s occupation. Either way your dad is not taking your feelings into consideration. Having you follow your father into his occupation might be a dream he has been harboring for a long time. But this is his dream not yours. Perhaps someday it might appeal to you but you have to come to that conclusion on your own.
In many ways your father probably thinks he is doing what is in your best interests. This is a big part of parenting but as children get older they really need to be in a position to be able to make decisions for themselves. Parents still play an invaluable role offering advice, providing guidance and providing support in case their child stumbles upon the way. It would be a good idea to sit down with dad and mom if she is present and have a long discussion about your future. Try to find out why your father does not approve the career path that you are considering. Let him know why and your reasons for wanting to pursue this occupation. Listen to his comments and his reasoning why he thinks it is not a good profession to go into. It is not so much that either one of you has to change your minds but hear the other person and acknowledge that you understand their point of view. From there maybe you can come to decision as to what you will consider doing with your future. Bear in mind that the average person changes their major 3 times over the course of their college careers. So even though you think that you know what you want to do right now there is a good chance that could change.
If college is in your future you parents will have much more input because most likely they will be assuming most if not all the financial responsibility. Since the cost of college is so significant, it is important that you choose wisely and leave yourself options.
Signed: TeenHealthFX
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