TeenHealthFX thinks that it is very important for you to find someone to talk with about the issues you described above. You have a lot on your plate right now – stress about school, ongoing conflicts with your boyfriend, continued grieving for your friend’s death 3 years ago, and a past relationship that was at the very least verbally abusive in nature. And what is probably feeling even more stressful and depressing about coping with these things is that it sounds like you are feeling really alone and isolated in terms of not having anyone to talk to about them.
FX thinks it would be helpful for you to meet with a therapist to discuss these issues that are currently leaving you feeling stressed and depressed. A therapist can help you to work through these feelings, find ways to better deal with some of the difficult and stressful situations in your life, and can basically be there for you as a source of support and guidance. And if you find that trusting people is a general problem for you that leaves you somewhat alone and isolated, this would be a helpful thing to discuss with your therapist as well so that you can get an understanding of why trusting others is so difficult for you, as well as to find a way to recognize the friends and adults out there who are trustworthy and caring people.
If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area. You can also contact your insurance company to get a list of in-network mental health providers or check with your school social worker or psychologist to get a list of referrals in your area.
In addition, if you find you are having trouble coping with the verbal abuse that took place with your ex, or ever find yourself in an abusive relationship in the future, there are counselors and organizations that specialize in working with people who are in (or have been in) abusive relationships. If you live in New Jersey you can contact JBWS (Jersey Battered Women’s Services) at 973-267-4763. This phone number is a 24 hour confidential helpline. Outside of NJ you can contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) – 1-800-787-3224 (TTY line for deaf callers) – 24 hours, 7days a week.