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"Mess" I Created with Yes

Published: August 30, 2012
Dear TeenHealthFX,

I really need your help. I have know a boy on my soccer team for a long time but we end up only seeing each other every 2 years. I have had a crush on him since a long time and we are good friends. Now I kind of liked another boy on my team but not as much as him. He asked me out at a party and I said yes in the heat of the moment and didn't think anything through. Then we broke up because an older girl told me to get away from him or their will be consequences. He wants me back and is threaten suicide if I say no. How can I get out of this mess I created with yes?


Dear "Mess" I Created with Yes,

The most important thing for you to realize is that you did not create this situation. This boy is trying to control you by threatening to harm himself. It is extremely unhealthy to hold on to a relationship by threatening suicide or being held captive in a relationship by a suicide threat.  

Before things go too far it is very important that you let your parents know what is going on. The longer you keep this information to yourself the more isolated and anxious you will begin to feel. The goal of reaching out to your parent’s or an adult you trust is to get this boy help and give you support. Even if you think he is not serious about harming himself, he needs to learn to deal with his insecurity in a better way. He also needs to learn that what he is doing is extraordinarily unfair to you.

This is a relationship that you should not be in and TeenHealthFX is telling you that without even taking into consideration that an “older girl” has made a veiled threat against you.

 

Signed: TeenHealthFX

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