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13 Year Old With Low Self Esteem

Published: May 14, 2012
Dear TeenHealthFX,
I am a 13 year old girl and I have very low self-esteem cuz I feel every other person is better than me so I often ask myself why on earth was I born? I feel trapped on earth. I really don't have anyone to talk to and I can't talk to my mum cuz she won't listen. I spend most of my time alone in the dark. I don't like myself, I TOTALLY HATE ME!!!, I don't like me at all. I've got to get someone to talk to about this but I can't cuz all of my friends are in Africa (I just moved from there). I am a very emotional person and I hate it cuz people use that to take advantage of me. I just feel me life is very BOORing and I shouldn't be in this world cuz the world would be a better place without me and everyone would be happier if they didn't know me. I just have to stop here before I cry my eyes out.
Signed: 13 Year Old With Low Self Esteem

Dear 13 Year Old With Low Self Esteem,


TeenHealthFX is sorry to hear that you are feeling so unhappy with yourself. Feeling so alone and isolated can be very scary - you are very right in that you need to find someone to talk to.

TeenHealthFX understands that moving can be a difficult transition - especially when you move to a new country and are feeling far from your friends and culture. For many people a move like that can be a really tough transition, but at your age, it can be particularly hard since your friends no doubt play such an important role in your life. As impossible as it may seem, making new friends will happen in time. But before you can look to your peers for acceptance, you have to find a way to accept yourself.


Maybe talking to a therapist would be helpful for you. If deep down you feel every person is better than you, then your life is bound to be full of disappointments. The reality is that you are a special person, but if you are not seeing it, then therapy could help. If you live in northern New Jersey, you can get help finding a psychiatrist or therapist by calling the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888.247.1400.

If the depression becomes overwhelming and you are afraid of what you might do, please get help immediately. In New Jersey, please call Atlantic Behavioral Health's 24-Hour Crisis Hotline at (973) 540.0100. Outside of NJ, please call the Suicide & Crisis Hotline at 800.999.9999.


In the meantime, have a look at our answer to Modeling and Low Self Esteem.  It offers some advice on how to build your self-confidence and develop some more self-esteem and TeenHealthFX thinks you might find it helpful.

Know that you are not alone in this struggle to figure out who you are and learning to accept yourself to accept yourself for the unique, special person that you are. Getting help is the first step in this process - we hope that you follow through and reach out so that you can start to feel better.

Signed: TeenHealthFX