If what is keeping you with your boyfriend right now is a fear of what he may do to you or himself, then this is certainly not the foundation of a healthy and loving relationship. FX thinks that it is very important for you to reach out to a trusted adult for help with this situation so that you can get some guidance and support as to how to best proceed with ending things in as safe way as possible. You could speak to your parents or a counselor at school – but given that you are worried something really problematic could result from a break-up with this person, do not try and figure this out on your own.
In talking to a trusted adult about this, keep the following in mind:
· If you are worried that your boyfriend may try to harm himself in any way as a result of the break-up, make sure that an adult (such as a school counselor) knows about your concern so that she/he can intervene on your boyfriend’s behalf to ensure his physical and emotional well-being.
· Whatever your boyfriend feels or does as a result of a break-up with you is his responsibility and is only in his control. You are not to blame and you are not responsible for any emotions he has or any actions he chooses to take as a result of your ending the relationship. You can do your best to make sure the relationship is ended in a kind and respectful way, you can encourage him to seek out counseling if you think he needs it, and you can tell an adult if you have concerns that he might try to harm himself, but in the end what he feels and does is completely and totally in his control.
· If you have any reason to think your boyfriend might try to harm you as a result of a break-up – either concern before the break-up or as a result of anything he does or says following a break-up, tell a trusted adult immediately!
Your boyfriend certainly may be a good person, and you may care about him and his well-being – but you are not responsible for his emotional health. So, again, if you are staying with him out of fear of what he may do to himself or you, then seek out help from a trusted adult as soon as possible.