The Guy I'm Interested In Isn't Ready For Another Relationship Yet

Published: April 21, 2014
Dear The Guy I'm Interested In Isn't Ready For Another Relationship Yet,

This guy and I really like each other, but he has just gotten out of a bad relationship at the end of last year, and isn't ready for another one at the moment . We had sex a while ago, and he still hasn't asked me to be his girlfriend. I don't want to be pushy, or make him ask me out. I want a relationship with him, I just don't know how to approach him about it. What do I do?


Dear The Guy I'm Interested In Isn't Ready For Another Relationship Yet,

If you are really interested in this guy, but you are seeing that he is not yet ready for another commitment right now, then the best you can do is to let him know that you are interested in seeing what could happen between the two of you when and if he might be ready to give it a try. If he is ready to try a relationship with you now, that’s great. If not, then there is nothing you can do to force it. 

In the meantime, FX would recommend that you not be sexually involved with him if you see he is not able to make any kind of commitment or emotional investment in the relationship. It could end up being very hurtful for you to be so physically intimate with someone who is not able to be emotionally intimate and committed right now.

FX would also recommend that you think about what you want to do with your time right now given that he is not yet ready to date. Do you want to see other people? Are you ok with waiting to see if he will one day be ready to try out a relationship with you? What would be best for you during this time?

There is a great saying when it comes to dating: Never choose someone who has to think twice about choosing you. As much as you like this guy, if he’s not ready to be in a relationship, FX suggests finding someone who is. And if the two of you are truly meant to be, it will happen one way or another down the road.

If you find you are struggling with your feelings about this or how to handle the situation, then FX recommends speaking to a trusted adult so you can get the support and guidance you need.

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