Issues In My Home Environment

Published: September 18, 2018
Dear TeenHealthFX,

What should I do? I can't live like this anymore. I'm 16 years old and I'm practically raising myself. I buy my own food, clothes, and I own a dog an a cat I pay for and take care of. Anything I don't do for myself I have to ask my grandma to help with. My mother is a lair, manipulative, an she likes trying to guilt trip others to get what she wants. She turns everything good I say or am proud of into how she did it better or how I could have done it better. I stopped falling for the guilt tripping. Today she wanted me to cook for my sisters because her back hurt; I told her that I didn't care anymore I wasn't helping and she proceeded to hit me twice for saying it. She has also came close to hitting me 2 other times and threaten to call the cops on me once after I grabbed her arm after she was trying to take something from me as her 200+ body was on top of me. I helped my Grandmother paint the deck yesterday because she needed help and my mother and sisters didn't want to her help. Due to that I had to stay up past one in the morning doing school work which I didn't finish, so I worried until 4 am about it. I got maybe 1 hour of sleep because they wake me up at 5:30 am when they are getting ready for school; this is because I have been sleeping on the living room couch because I don't have a bed. I know this is poorly written but I just wanted to get all the information written down.

Signed: Issues In My Home Environment

Dear Issues In My Home Environment,

TeenHealthFX would like to begin by stating that we are sorry for your current situation and remind you that there are resources available to you.

Abuse can take place in many forms, including: physical, sexual, emotional and neglect. Abuse may occur for several reasons. Some abusers:

  • Are unable to manage their angry properly, and thus lash out at others inappropriately.
  • Feel that anger is a proper way to discipline children.
  • Behave abusively because they also grew up in an abusive environment, and are unable to recognize the abuse. 
  • Suffer from mental illness.

 

Abuse victims must first understand that the abuse is not their fault. Most importantly, they must seek help. You can speak to a trusted adult, such as a school counselor, nurse, teacher, coach or primary care physician. Your trusted adult of choice can refer you to a mental health professional, such as a therapist.

If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area. You can also contact your insurance company to get a list of in-network mental health providers or check with your school social worker or psychologist to get a list of referrals in your area.

If you are not comfortable speaking to a trusted adult, TeenHealthFX recommends the following hotlines and resources:

  • Call the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453). This is a 24-hour hotline with resources to aid in every child abuse situation. All calls are confidential.
  • The National Youth Crisis Hotline is for youths, 17 years of age or younger who are in crisis. Call 1-800-448-4663 (24 hours, 7 days a week).  
Signed: TeenHealthFX

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