Family Abuse And Violence / Question
Published: February 19, 2004
Dear TeenHealthFX,
People who know me tell me I'm being abused (I'm 15), but I'm not sure. My mom is cool, but when she gets mad or something ticks her off she punches, kicks, and slaps me but who doesn't get hit, right? Well she also always calls me names like a dirty pig, worthless piece of shit, ugly bitch that has no friends and other crap. She was like this since I was little like 6 or 7. But I'm really unsure of myself, like I think I'm ugly and I don't feel like a guy could like me and I cry every night, I want so bad to feel like I'm pretty and good when I walk down the halls. I think it's because of my mom, I have a 7 year old sister and she doesn't really get hit and my mom always tells her that she is the good child and that she hopes she turns out better then me. It hurts so much and I don't know what to do, I have like no friends and if I tell anyone she just tell them I'm a liar and then beat me up bad when we go home. Please, please, PLEASE you have to answer back I don't know what to do; I just want it to end ALL OF IT! (I also thought about suicide but it won't work)!
Signed: Empty Bruises - Mom Is Abusive
Dear Empty Bruises - Mom Is Abusive,
What your mother is doing to you is wrong! Hitting, punching, slapping, name-calling and constant put-downs are forms of both verbal and physical abuse. This is not your fault and you do need help with this.
From the sounds of your question, you may have reached out before to a family friend or relative, but nothing was done and your mother found out about it. This resulted in you getting abused again. In order to break this cycle TeenHealthFX wants you to talk to a trusted adult such as a teacher, school counselor or school nurse. They will keep your discussion confidential but they are required (by law) to report potential abuse to Child Protective Services. You can also call your local Child Protective Services yourself - the toll free number is 800-522-3511. You can also log onto ChildHelp USA for reporting in your community.
Once a report has been filed, an investigation will occur. If there is abuse, you and your sister will be removed from the home and counseling will be provided for all individuals involved. These professionals are there to help you and ensure that you are not in danger. Your sister is also at risk for abuse (even though nothing has happened yet).
If you ever feel that you are in immediate danger from your mother, do not go home; go to the police.
Physical and verbal abuse has already damaged you emotionally by affecting your self-esteem and self-confidence. The yelling and fear that accompanies the abuse can wear you down. But all is not lost - with professional help you can work through this and begin to feel better. It is important to remember that abuse is not your fault and you do not deserve it. There are counselors and therapists who can help you deal with and provide an outlet for your emotions.
If you get to the point that you are seriously considering suicide or are afraid of your impulses then you need to seek help immediately. You can call 911 or go to your nearest hospital emergency room. In northern
If you live in northern
Signed: TeenHealthFX
Teens whose parents talk to them regularly about the dangers of drugs are 42% less likely to use drugs than those whose parents don’t, yet only 1 in 4 teens report having these conversations. 
