Questions About Therapy/Concerns About Therapists / Question
Published: April 30, 2008
Dear TeenHealthFX,
i have been going to a doctor to try and deal with being raped as a young child. i am only 15 and really do not like this doctor. i am not opposed to getting help, but my parents think i need to stick with this doctor. do i have the right to refuse treatment? do minors have that right or does it belong to my parents? i live in ny. please answer, i need help.
Signed: Don't Like The Professional Helping Me To Deal With Having Been Raped
Dear Don't Like The Professional Helping Me To Deal With Having Been Raped,
TeenHealthFX would first like to state that we are very sorry to hear that you were raped as a child – that you had to go through such a terrible experience and that you are having difficulty working through these issues with your current therapist. FX can appreciate that it can be a difficult and painful process to work through all of the thoughts and emotions related to a rape in therapy, however, we also think that therapy with a trained professional is critical for people who have been through any kind of sexual abuse or assault in terms of helping them to recover from the experience – so we do hope that you find someone with whom you can work well with.
As far as dealing with this issue with your current therapist, FX would hope that this wouldn’t have to come down to any kind of legal consent issue – that you, your parents and this therapist could sit down together to discuss this problem and to come up with an alternate plan for your treatment. FX recommends that you think about what it is about this therapist that makes you feel uncomfortable. For example, is the therapist the same sex as your rapist? Is there something about this therapist’s work style or personality that doesn’t sit well with you? Do you feel that this therapist does not have special training in terms of working with adolescents or victims of a sexual crime? Compile a list of what is getting in the way of your feeling comfortable with your current therapist, and present this to your parents and therapist (whether to each individually or to all at once during a family session). Be clear with everyone that you want to deal with the issues you are having related to the rape, but that you feel unable to do so with a therapist with whom you do not feel comfortable. If your parents or the therapist are resistant to the idea of your finding someone new, ask them to explain to you why they are not taking your comfort level more into consideration in terms of who you work with. And, if necessary, talk to a trusted adult – such as a school counselor or your primary care physician – about your concerns of feeling forced to meet with this particular therapist so that another adult can advocate for you and your treatment needs with your parents.
If you live in northern
You can also contact the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network (RAINN), 1-800-656-HOPE (4673), 24 hours, 7days a week or visit www.rain.org.
Signed: TeenHealthFX
Less than 33% of teens with depression get help, yet 80% of teens with depression can be successfully treated if they seek help from a doctor or therapist.
