TeenHealthFX - Answers - Ex Boyfriend Forced Sex On Me

Dating Violence & Date Rape / Question
Published: March 23, 2009

Dear TeenHealthFX,

My ex- boyfriend would alway force sex on me when I would beg and cry for him to stop. Later on I found out I was pregnant. I had the baby and love it very much. I broke up with my boy friend, But its very hard for me to get over everything that happened. Is there anything I can do to help me get over it more quickly?

Signed: Ex Boyfriend Forced Sex On Me - How Can I Quickly Get Over It?

Dear Ex Boyfriend Forced Sex On Me - How Can I Quickly Get Over It?,

From what you have described, you repeatedly endured date rape with your ex-boyfriend – and TeenHealthFX is very sorry that you had to continually go through such a horrible experience. Even though he was your boyfriend at the time, he did not have the right to have sex with you without your consent. If you told him to stop – in your case “beg and cry” for him to stop – and he forced sex on you anyways, he was committing date rape, which is against the law.

FX can imagine that what happened between you and your boyfriend was very traumatic for you, and that you may be having continued difficulties dealing with your thoughts and feelings about what he did to you. FX thinks that it is important for you to seek out help from professional counselors trained in dealing with victims of sexual assault. That way you can get support and guidance as you work through this, and you can also get some education and assistance to help ensure that you do not end up in ongoing relationships with abusive individuals in the future.

If you live in New Jersey you can contact JBWS (Jersey Battered Women’s Services) at 973-267-4763. This phone number is a 24 hour confidential helpline. Outside of NJ you can contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) – 1-800-787-3224 (TTY line for deaf callers) – 24 hours, 7days a week.

If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 973-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area. You can also contact your insurance company to get a list of in-network mental health providers or check with your school social worker or psychologist to get a list of referrals in your area.

Signed: TeenHealthFX