Parents & Family / Question
Published: February 10, 2004
Dear TeenHealthFX,
I just had a question about my mom, but it's affecting the rest of the family too. She's had severe back pain for years and years. It's a lot worse now, though, because her doctors think that she may have a pinched nerve and I was wondering if there was ANYTHING that could be done about that. They also think that she may have Hepatitis B or C - they're not sure which one. Everyday is so depressing now with all the homework, semester exams, and to top it all off, we haven't even hung a little candy cane up for Christmas decorations. The house isn't clean enough for that but my sister and I are trying to take care of it. Please just give me any information you can because now it's getting to the point where she says that she doesn't even want to wake up in the morning anymore. Please help.
Signed: Mom's Condition Affecting The Rest Of The Family
Dear Mom's Condition Affecting The Rest Of The Family,
TeenHealthFX is really sorry about all the difficulties your mom and your family are dealing with. Any type of ongoing, debilitating pain can make a person feel depressed, anxious, angry or even hopeless. In a family, if one member is feeling this way, it can affect everyone else - like what you are experiencing. Your mom needs to continue to work closely with her doctors to manage her pain. If she does not start feeling better soon, we would urge her to find another doctor for an evaluation.
So what can you do? You can learn to manage your own stress - check out our answer to I.M. Stressed for tips on what you can do. We also recommend that you talk to a counselor or teacher at school about what is going on. They can help you with what is going on at school and can be supportive about what is going on at home.
If these suggestions do not help then it is time to talk to a professional. Talking to a counselor can give you support and help you cope with the stress. A counselor can also see your whole family to help everyone deal with the changes in their lives. Not having money or insurance should not keep you from counseling - many agencies see people on a sliding scale basis, meaning that you pay what you can afford to.
If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 973-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area.
Signed: TeenHealthFX
While 93% of teenage women report that their first intercourse was voluntary, one-quarter of these young women report that it was unwanted. 
