Not Satisfied With Being Single / Question
Published: June 12, 2003
Dear TeenHealthFX,
I am 16 and never had a proper boyfriend - yeah I am not the best looking girl around or the thinnest but I am definitely not the worst. I only real kissed a guy when I was 16 he wanted to go further but I didn't want to cause he didn't want me he just wanted sex. All my friends have had loads of boyfriends and most of them have had sex. And I feel really left out when they talk about boyfriends and sex cause they don't know how I feel or that I haven't had a boyfriend and only kissed 1 lad - and I didn't even like it.
Signed: 16 And Never Had A Boyfriend
Dear 16 And Never Had A Boyfriend,
TeenHealthFX understands that you are feeling left out, but we want to remind you that there is no timeline for dating. Some people start sooner than others, and some people have an easier time finding people they are compatible with than others.
In your question you mention a lot about your appearance, but we hope you know that this is not the thing that makes you special. We hope that when you do meet someone you want to be with, they will want to be with you because of all the things that make you unique, not because of what you look like.
It sounds to us like you have a very strong self-esteem. You knew you did not want to have sex with the boy you kissed because you did not feel that he was interested in you for the reasons you would want him to be. Unfortunately, a lot of people have sex because they feel pressured into it or because it is what their friends are doing, but it sounds like you have a clear sense of what you would want in a sexual partner. This is a valuable thing to have before you enter into a relationship.
You say that your friends have had loads of boyfriends, but you do not say what their relationships are like. Just because they are in relationships does not mean they are perfectly happy with their partners or with themselves. It takes a very strong person to be alone. We realize it is not always easy, but if you are waiting for the right person to come along - someone who appreciates you for who you are - you are doing the right thing for you, regardless of what your friends are doing. It may take time, but when you do find the right person, it will be all the more special.
Signed: TeenHealthFX
The reality of excessive interest rates and fees that often accompany credit card use for teens, can put youngsters in a position where they are losing out on admission to graduate school, getting a job, or renting an apartment because of damaged credit history.
