Significant Others: Girlfriends & Boyfriends / Question
Published: February 14, 2006
Dear TeenHealthFX,
I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for almost two years, and really love him, but now he's starting to scare me. A few months ago I saw a bloody cat inside his shed, and from what he said about it I think he killed it. He's started telling me how much he wants to hurt some pople at our school, how he wants to kill his brother. This sounds stupid, but it's just lots of small stuff that make me scared of him. Should I tell someone about this?
Signed: My Boyfriend Is Starting To Scare Me
Dear My Boyfriend Is Starting To Scare Me,
TeenHealthFX can understand that you would be feeling scared right now based on the statements and actions that you described. The things your boyfriend has said and done – killing animals, threatening to hurt classmates, threatening to kill his brother – are certainly more than “small stuff” and are definite cause for concern and immediate attention.
Not only is intentionally harming or killing animals a felony, it is an indication that the person involved has very angry and aggressive impulses, as well as difficulties controlling those impulses. And threats of harm against others should always be taken seriously – particularly when there is real concern that the person is capable of or intending on acting on his/her threats.
FX recommends that you tell someone immediately about your concerns – whether it’s your parents, a school counselor, teacher, school principal, or any other trusted adult. School officials need to be notified so that they can provide whatever protection is needed for the students attending their school. And your boyfriend’s parents need to be aware of his statements and actions so that they can make sure their other son is safe, as well as to get your boyfriend the treatment that he needs to ensure his safety as well as the safety of those around him.
If you ever have immediate concern for the safety of someone your boyfriend has made threats against, or your boyfriend, himself, call 911.
Signed: TeenHealthFX
Less than 33% of teens with depression get help, yet 80% of teens with depression can be successfully treated if they seek help from a doctor or therapist.
