TeenHealthFX - Answers - Confused (About Parent's Potential Substance Abuse)

Parents & Family / Question
Published: March 13, 2003

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I have found a drug substance in my parents room. Should I confront them about this? How should I confront them about this? Thank you very much for your opinion!

Signed: Confused (About Parent's Potential Substance Abuse)

Dear Confused (About Parent's Potential Substance Abuse),

FX can understand why finding a potential "drug substance" in your parents' room would make you concerned since they are your parents and you care about them.

However, only you can make this decision as to whether or not you should bring this up with them. And whether or not you do will partially depend on your relationship with them. If you do decide to bring it up, it should be addressed in one of two ways. Here is FX's thoughts:

1. If you feel absolutely uncomfortable talking to them about this, you could discuss it with another trusted adult like a family friend or a relative. They may be able to help you get the situation addressed.

2. If you and your parents have a good relationship, it is good to let them know your suspicions. If you do not feel comfortable telling them that you found this "substance", you can just say that they exhibited a behavior that worried you. Or maybe your relationship is good enough where you can just be honest. Either way, here are some tips on talking to them about this:

Plan out a time to talk when your home environment is calm and everyone is less stressed..

Be levelheaded. Think about your concerns in advance and how you would like to discuss it. Make a list of points if needed and tell them.

Keep your cool. Be calm and present your side logically. Try not to be confrontational.

Do not lose your temper and try not to be defensive.

Do not attack your parents verbally. You want to hear their side.

Tell your parents that you are talking to them because you care. Also, remember that it may not be theirs or it may not even be drugs.

Regardless of how it is handled, you will feel better about this potential "drug situation" once it is addressed.

Signed: TeenHealthFX