TeenHealthFX - Answers - Panicked About Talking To Guys

Not Satisfied With Being Single / Question
Published: August 1, 2000

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I have problems talking to guys. I mean guys that I like at school. But I can talk to just a guy friend easily. And online, if I'm talking to a guy I like or not, I am more comfortable somehow. It's easier for me to be myself. How do I get up the courage to talk to guys I like without panicking and not having anything to say? (In real life, not online)

Signed: Panicked About Talking To Guys

Dear Panicked About Talking To Guys,

It is very normal to be a little nervous before approaching a guy you like. Most teens get nervous when then try to talk to the guy they like. You are probably worried about whether or not he likes you as well, and the idea that he may not respond to you is upsetting.

Many people find it easier to talk on the net. The Internet is completely anonymous and confidential so there is not a threat there. Just be careful when giving out information to others on the net. Unfortunately, there are people who use the Internet for criminal reasons like sexual abuse.

Go into the situation not expecting too much and you hopefully will not be as nervous. Think of the special guys as your friends as well. It is probably a good idea to become better acquainted with some of them before you hand over your heart anyway. As far as talking to guys in person, it is important to that you learn to communicate your feelings. It is important that you do not rush into anything. Socializing with guys takes some time and practice. You may even want to try the mirror a few times or try talking it out with friends. Try practicing what you might say to him the next time you see him. But most of all try to be natural, he probably is not much better at this than you.

TeenHealthFX wants you to know that you are not alone, guys just like girls are just as nervous. He is your equal, just one that you might like a little better than other guy friends. Go into the situation not expecting too much and it should ease your nervousness. It is to your advantage that you have the Internet to use, but do not rely on it. Talking with your own peers is very important, so get your feet wet slowly. Even if this guy is not the one, there are probably plenty more to come. It is normal for you to get that feeling of panic or nervous flutter in your stomach each time you are in put into these new situations, but it will get easier over time, TeenHealthFX thinks this is completely normal.

Signed: TeenHealthFX