Friends / Question
Published: August 10, 2000
Dear TeenHealthFX,
My friend lies a lot about major things and sometimes-stupid little things for no reason. What's the point of all this lying? I was wondering if it's possible to have compulsive lying disorder. How can I tell and should I say anything about it to her?
Signed: Doesn't Like Liars
Dear Doesn't Like Liars,
TeenHealthFX has to agree in the fact that lying is not a good character trait for a person to have, but keep in mind the reasons as to why your friend might feel the need to lie. In your question you asked if there is such a thing as a compulsive liar and there is what is known as a pathological liar, where the person does not see the difference between truth and falsehoods. FX does not blame you for not liking this aspect of your friend, but do not give up on her quite yet!
There could be a number of reasons why your friend finds it necessary to lie. Lying can serve a purpose. Some people have very low self-esteem/worth. If they do not feel good enough about something they could lie about it to make themselves feel better, or perhaps less embarrassed, or even look good in other's eyes. Your friend also may have not been taught that lying is wrong and therefore does not realize that she is hurting people.
If you feel comfortable you could approach your friend about your concerns. You should try to talk about this at a time when things are going well - not at a time when you are upset or you think your friend is lying. Try not to be judgmental. Try finding out why your friend may be telling lies and decide whether or not she is lying because she does not know it is wrong, or needs a real friend to show them that being who they are is good enough for you, and that lying is not necessary. By showing your friend that you care, she may want to change. Give her a chance and if she continues on with this bad habit it could be possible that lying serves a purpose for her and that she may be unable to stop at this time.
Signed: TeenHealthFX
Nearly all the poison deaths in the 
