TeenHealthFX - Answers - 19 Year Old With A Low Sex Drive

Sexuality & Sexual Health: Miscellaneous / Question
Published: February 28, 2009

Dear TeenHealthFX,

I am 19 and female and a virgin. I had a "boyfriend" (though we never officially went out) last year and we made out and fooled around a little but nothing serious. However, I always felt a little taken advantage of because he got more sexual pleasure than I did out of everything and I wasn't all that into any of it. Though I am very emotionally and physically attracted to men, I don't have much of a sex drive. I don't think about it often and I don't have any desire for it really. Is this normal? I read on some health sites that low sex drives in women are normal but I've always been under the impression that teenagers and young adults have high sex drives. I'm not all that worried because I don't have a boyfriend right now and I am busy with life and college and I am happy, but I am wondering how likely it is that this low sex drive will persist.

Signed: 19 Year Old With A Low Sex Drive

Dear 19 Year Old With A Low Sex Drive,

There can be many reasons a person experiences a low sex drive. A few examples of causes of a low sex drive might include issues with hormone levels, mental health illnesses such as depression, issues in how you relate to your significant other or people in general when it comes to being close and intimate in some way, or as a result from taking certain medications. Without knowing more about you, it is impossible for FX to know whether this is medical, mental health, or relationship issue. FX recommends that you start by meeting with your primary care physician or gynecologist to discuss your low sex drive and any underlying medical issues that might be contributing to this problem. If there is no medical issue related to your low sex drive, you could then meet with a mental health professional to discuss whether any mental health illnesses or relationship issues are interfering in your drive and desire to be physically intimate.

If you don't have a doctor and live in northern New Jersey, you can call the Adolescent/Young Adult Center for Health at 973-971-6475 for an appointment or contact your local teen health center. You can also contact your insurance company for a list of in-network providers.

If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 973-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area. You can also contact your insurance company to get a list of in-network mental health providers or check with your school social worker or psychologist to get a list of referrals in your area.

Signed: TeenHealthFX