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Did I Do The Wrong Thing By Blurting Out What Happened To Me?

Published: May 14, 2012
Dear TeenHealthFX,
I was molested as a child....About 5 years later I tried to speak to someone about it for the first time. I don't know why i chose to talk to this kid. she was about a year older than me and I didn't know her very well. I just sort of blurted it out. she thought i was joking and dismissed it. i know it was stupid to just spill it like that but i got really angry. after that we didn't really talk at all we went our separate ways. i feel kinda bad for burdening her with something like that. did i do the wrong thing? it's been almost four years since then but i still think about it sometimes.
Signed: Did I Do The Wrong Thing By Blurting Out What Happened To Me?

Dear Did I Do The Wrong Thing By Blurting Out What Happened To Me?,

 

TeenHealthFX thinks that you need to be more forgiving of yourself for telling this girl about what happened to you, for getting angry at her for dismissing it, and for worrying now that you may have burdened her with that information. Sexual abuse is a very terrible and difficult thing for anybody to have to go through, to say the least. And it can feel equally unpleasant and painful for a victim of sexual abuse to talk about the details of what happened to them as it can be to keep it a secret and bottle up all the thoughts and feelings associated with it. So FX thinks that you need to be compassionate with yourself about all of the different emotions you were probably experiencing at the time around the idea of sharing this information with someone – your mixed feelings on the matter probably account for why you blurted this out and then reacted the way you did.

 

FX wonders if you are feeling ready to discuss your experience and the feeling related to it at this point in your life. We think that it would be very helpful for you to meet with a mental health professional trained in working with victims of sexual abuse – whether now or whenever you do feel ready – so that you can work through what happened to you. Meeting with a therapist would allow you to process your emotions associated with being molested, give you a safe outlet for discussing your thoughts and feelings, provide you with support with what you are going through, and offer you a place where you can get some guidance on who you want to share this information with.

 

If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area.

For more information you can also contact the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network (RAIN) at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673), 24 hours, 7days a week.

Signed: TeenHealthFX

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