I Just Want To Know How To Make Everything Better
Published: April 02, 2020
Hi, i'm 15 years old, and i have three siblings, i'm the youngest and the rest are in collage. I usually come off as happy and responsible cause i don't want to bother anyone. But inside i feel empty, sad and alone. I don't necessarily get along with my siblings, they constantly make fun of me for being to sensitive. My dad doesn't even show emotion so i cant really talk to him about this stuff. The only person i ever confided in was my mom. and i finally "snapped" and broke down in front of my mom, she was supportive for a bit, then a couple days later she said i was dramatic, and lying and to "grow up". Which was probably the worst case scenario. I don't have any other family members to talk to. So I went to my school counselor for help, she was sweet and supportive. And then she directed me to someone who deals with the stuff i was feeling. We talked and part of the deal is he would call my parents and get them to talk to me about it. A week went by and my parents said nothing, i asked the counselor if he called them. He said yes and that they said they would talk to me. So they really just didn't care. I've been having suicidal thoughts, i really don't have the guts to hurt myself, but sometimes i wish i could. I just feel so trapped and alone all the time, and i don't know what to do and i wish i was gone. I feel like such a burden to everyone all the time. I just want to know how to make everything better.
Signed: I Just Want To Make Everything Better
Dear I Just Want To Make Everything Better,
TeenHealthFX is sorry to hear about what you are going through. Being a teenager can be very challenging. We would like to point out how brave it was to talk to your mom and school counselor to seek help. Even though it didn’t work out as you thought it would when you spoke to your mom or with the counselor, don’t give up hope.
It seems that you feel comfortable talking to your school counselor, so we suggest that you reach out to her again. Let her know what happened with the counselor. She may have another suggestion. Also, since you mention suicidal thoughts, we strongly suggest you try talking to your mom, school counselor or another trusted adult as soon as possible. It is very important you tell someone how you are feeling so you can get the help you need to get better.
TeenHealthFX cannot diagnose over the internet - if you live in Northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist, you can call the Access Center for Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888-247-1400.
If you get to a point that you are seriously considering hurting yourself or others, you must seek help immediately. Call 911 or go to the nearest hospital emergency room. The Northern New Jersey crisis hotline from Morristown Medical Center is 973-540-0100. Outside of this area call the Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255 or Text "Home" to 741741. All mentioned options are open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.