Digital Self-Harm
What is digital self-harm?
Digital self-harm is when someone anonymously posts derogatory comments about themselves online. It is considered to be a newer type of self-harm that teenagers are using to express self-hatred and depression.
What makes digital self-harm so hard to identify and address?
It is very difficult to spot this behavior. In order to determine whether or not digital self-harm is taking place, it generally means having access to the IP address from which online comments are posted. Similar to hiding the cuts and scars associated with self-cutting, it is relatively easy for teens to hid this behavior.
Why do people participate in digital self-harm?
There are various reasons teens participate in this behavior. Some examples include:
Teens who feel a sense of self-hatred and depression can participate in various types of self-destructive and self-aggressive behaviors, as can teens who are dealing with PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) and difficulties regulating emotions. This can include digital self-harm.
Teens who are struggling socially and emotionally, and who are not getting the help and support they need, may do this to draw attention to themselves. It is a kind of cry for help because there are some significant and important unmet needs they are longing to have filled.
Some teens may hope that by others seeing these negative comments directed towards them, it will elicit sympathy from peers or perhaps show them who their true friends are in terms of peers who end up checking in with them or who come to their aid. Humans are social creatures who generally long to connect to others. People of all ages will try various ways to form connections with others when healthier methods are not working.
Some teens who are angry may use digital self-harm as a way of justifying to others their anger and lashing out at other people. If people appear to being treating them in a cruel and mean way, they may feel more justified isolating themselves or treating others the same way.
Teens who are worried about being bullied in school or online might cyberbully themselves as a way to beat them to the punch.
Whatever the reason a teen participates in digital self-harm, what is clear is that person is struggling socially and emotionally in some way and is in need of help and support from others.
What are the implications of digital self-harm?
Digital self-harm is further evidence that teenagers do not have the support they need or sufficient access to mental health services. Potential solutions to this problem include depression screenings in schools, increased access to mental health services in schools and in the community, education about various mental health issues (including digital self-harm), and increased efforts to connect teens with various online resources where they can get begin to get the help and support they need.
Digital self-harm may also be a related to teenagers living in a digital age where they can more easily feel less connected to other people in close, personal ways. Researchers have seen a correlation between increased use of smartphones and increased reports of loneliness among adolescents. Parents and teenagers may want to consider how much time each day is dedicated to screen time both in terms of understanding that excessive screen time could be an indication of depression, as well as viewing excessive screen time as potentially contributing to a sense of isolation and loneliness.
When this type of self-aggressive behavior is going on, it is very often a sign that the person does not have any trusted people (peers or adults) that he/she feels comfortable confiding in. It is important for friends and parents/caregivers to keep open lines of communication. This involves relating in a way with compassion rather than judgement, kindness and patience rather than hostility or anger, and a desire to understand rather than criticize. When teens experience others relating to them with compassion, kindness and an open mind, it allows them to feel more comfortable opening up so they are not suffering in silence.
Resources
For more information on digital self-harm, click here. If you, or someone you know if participating in digital self-harm, please reach out to a trusted adult as soon as possible so you can get the help you need. Please speak to a parent/guardian, school counselor or any other trusted adult who can help you to get connected with a reputable mental health professional, such as a clinical social worker or clinical psychologist. A therapist can work with you around this issue and provide you with the support and guidance you need.
If you live in northern New Jersey and need help finding a therapist you can call the Access Center from Atlantic Behavioral Health at 888-247-1400. Outside of this area you can log onto the US Department of Health and Human Services Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration website for referrals in your area. You can also contact your insurance company to get a list of in-network mental health providers or check with your school social worker or psychologist to get a list of referrals in your area.
