How Do I Ask My Girlfriend To Get STD Testing?

Published: August 28, 2018
Dear TeenHealthFX,

My girlfriend and me are in an open relationship. We don’t use condoms so how do I ask her to get tested

Signed: How Do I Ask My Girlfriend To Get STD Testing?

Dear How Do I Ask My Girlfriend To Get STD Testing?,

TeenHealthFX would like to begin by stating that we recommend all sexually active teenagers use condoms every time they have sexual intercourse. Condoms are the only form of birth control that can protect from sexually transmitted infections, and should be used in addition to another form of birth control for best protection.   

Further, Planned Parenthood suggests the following conversation-starters for asking your partner to get STD tested:

  • “This is hard for me to talk about, but I care about you and I think it's important. How do you feel about going to get tested for STDs together?”
  • “FYI, I got tested for STDs last month and I didn’t have anything. Have you ever been tested? I want us to make sure we’re taking care of each other.”
  • “I think it’s important to be honest, so I want to tell you that I got tested for STDs last month and found out I had chlamydia. I took medicine, and I don’t have it anymore. But it showed me how common and sneaky STDs are. Have you ever been tested?”


Since you are your partner are not currently using condoms, TeenHealthFX suggests scheduling an appointment with your physician. He/she can discuss safe sex practices, including potential birth control options. If you don't have a doctor and live in northern New Jersey, you can call the Adolescent/Young Adult Center for Health at 973-971-5199 for an appointment with an adolescent medicine specialist or contact your local teen health center or Planned Parenthood. A Planned Parenthood health center is a good option if you have concerns about cost or confidentiality issues. You can also contact your insurance company for a list of in-network providers. 


TeenHealthFX suggests the following resources for additional information: 


Signed: TeenHealthFX