We Have No Chemistry

Published: August 28, 2014
Dear TeenHealthFX,

Hi. Before I start I just want to say thanks for all the amazing answers you have given me through out the years. This time it's about my boyfriend. I like him as a person but our first kiss was really a turn off for me and his never ending compliments and pet names have started to annoy me. I like spending time with him but I don't want him trying to be all romantic and sweet...I just find it really awkward. And I cannot stand when he calls me sweetie. It's like he's a 50 year old man. I want to date him but I wish I hadn't become his girlfriend quite so quickly...it's like we have no chemistry. I don't want to break up with him as we have only been dating for about 1 month but I don't like when he tries to be romantic. What can I do to address this problem?

Dear We Have No Chemistry,

Thank you for your kind words, we very much appreciate them. 

You have to take some time and look at the situation. Ask yourself, “will giving it more time make a difference.”  If the answer is no, then you would need to share your feelings with your boyfriend. It will be a hard task, but in the end you owe him and you, the opportunity to find the person that brings something special to each one of your lives. Sometimes people avoid being straightforward because they won’t want to hurt the other person’s feelings. This approach very often just delays the inevitable and deepens the hurt. 

Since there seems to be some confusion on your part, “I want to date him but I wish I hadn't become his girlfriend quite so quickly.” It might be best to suggest that you would like to take a break from being boyfriend/girlfriend, until you have time to figure things out. This is about you and not a negative indictment on him. You obviously have positive feelings towards him but that doesn’t always translate into romance. All you can do is be honest. How he reacts is outside your control.

Signed: TeenHealthFX