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Is He Too Old To Be My Friend?

Published: July 08, 2020
Dear TeenHealthFX,
I am a 16 yo girl. Last year I met a guy who is 30. We hit it off from the start and have become very good friends. For the past year he has always been there for me and given me great advice and stuff. We have a lot of shared interests and we have fun talking to each other. I deeply value him as a friend and I think he once told me that he sees me as a little sister or something. While I am very happy to have such a amazing friend, I have been told that I should not be friends with him because he is almost twice my age and it might be illegal or something just to be friends with him. Idk how it can be illegal when we are just friends and none of our conversations have been even remotely sexual. We are just friends and he is an good friend and I don't want to lose him because of something as stupid as age. What should I do? Is just a friendship illegal with him?
Signed: Is He Too Old To Be My Friend?

Dear Is He Too Old To Be My Friend?,

Based on the information you gave us, it is difficult to give an exact answer. Also, we at TeenHealthFX are not lawyers, but various health professionals. We understand your friends concern and wonder if your parent or guardian is aware of this friendship? 

Being friends with someone who is double your age when you are a minor is not illegal. However, we want to make clear that a when a minor is with someone of over the age of 18, something as simple as touching or kissing is considered a “sexual act” and is illegal.  More information can be found here

In addition, we urge you to be cautious with this person especially if you are hanging out with them in person. Depending on where you live, it could require you to get your parents permission beforehand. 

TeenHealthFX understands how important the friendship may be, but we want to encourage you to consider the consequences for your friend since you are still a minor. In addition to that, make sure your parents are ok with you being friends with him to avoid any potential issues down the road.  

We hope this helps. Stay safe.  


Signed: TeenHealthFX